Does it really get easier as they get older?

Does it get easier - Ever-changing Life of a Mum“It’s easier as they get older” so many other parents keep telling me, but is it?

As my children grow older I am finding that this is certainly not the case. There is more to juggle now than ever before!

And this is what led to my eventual decision to leave my full time career and focus on my family (read more here). After 12 months, my daughter had lost her way and was screaming out for help, and quite frankly so had I. She needed me now more than ever before.

We are now a few weeks into the start of the school year. I always find it takes a little while to settle into the new school routine and we make adjustments to extra-curricular activities to find the right balance.

Even though I have fabulous support from family, I still found school hours quite prohibitive to working full time. Not to mention the juggling act of after school activities, play dates and the like.

But since making the huge decision to ditch my job and stay at home, I finally feel like I have some breathing space. Some time to walk in the door after school drop off, enjoy a coffee and remember that I need some time for myself too. It also provides a perfect opportunity to use the skills and experience I have gained over the past 15 years to work from home and develop my blog and freelance writing career.

As the years fly by, I find the emotional needs of my children are growing at an even faster rate. In the past, others may have been able to console my children’s fears or problems, but now I find Miss Nine is far more selective as to who she opens up to if she’s had a bad day at school or issues with her friends. Namely me. And that’s totally understandable.

A friend recently said to me: “Little children, little problems – big children, big problems”. And I’m finding this so very true.

As Miss 9 grows into a teenager I think it will be more important than ever just to be there when she needs me for advice or even just an afternoon out window shopping to forget about a bad day and have a girly chat. Hey, I think I will benefit from that too!

With my youngest starting school this year and baby #3 due in March it has cemented my decision. I’m really looking forward to spending some one on one time with bubs while my two girls are at school. But most of all, I feel grateful for this opportunity and the exciting times that lie ahead.

How do you find the juggle of motherhood, working, school and activities? Did you find life got harder or easier as your children got older?

31 thoughts on “Does it really get easier as they get older?

  1. Yes, I agree – the demands of school , homework, & news days and activities, let alone the after school sports & swimming overwhelm me some days. I do not know how working [outside the home] mums juggle it all.

  2. The combination of school and extracurricular routines definitely complicate things. I work part time (3 days in office + one from home) and hubby is a firefighter so works shifts, but gets quite a lot of time off. We juggle and some weeks are easier than others. Ours at 11.5 and 5 (he’s just started prep). The gap between them helps a bit and you’ll have that too, but I don’t know whether it makes things any less busy!

  3. My sons are now 25 and 23. In my experience it didn’t get easier as they got older. It didn’t really get harder either. Every stage is just different, with different ‘rules’, different strategies, different mistakes and different lessons to learn. And I don’t think that motherhood is ever over either. No matter how old they are, or where they are, they still need their mum. At least sometimes. 😉

    • So very true Lisa, every stage does have a totally different needs and that’s just what I’m discovering as my children get older. I totally agree that motherhood is for life – my girls will always be my babies no matter how old they are 😉 Thanks for reading and commenting.

    • Good that you are already aware of this now. Everyone kept telling me it would be easier when my children started school and I listened to them and went with their expectations to step up my career at this time. So when I the stress just kept increasing I didn’t cope very well.

  4. Having one adult son and three teenage sons, I can honestly say that it was much easier to parent littlies. I can’t tell you the amount of times I have wanted to rewind the clock. But having said that, you got this mumma….I have your back xx

  5. I do wonder how I will juggle my job (I work three days part-time) when my daughter starts prep next year. I think that’s great you’ve been able to give yourself some breathing space and enjoy your time with the kids. I said to someone with older kids recently that it gets easier when they get older – she laughed at me :/

    • Yes I laugh when people say that to me now too and often get a shocked look from them when I tell them my story. That being said, everyone’s situation is different and I coped better when I worked part-time as opposed to full-time but it was still a juggle. Thanks for reading and commenting.

  6. I love having older kids. MY eldest just turned nine too and I find right now the best time ever. The kids can do so much for themselves and they are great company. Personally, I found little kids and babies such a busy time and so demanding. Babies are lovely, but big kids are great fun.

    • Yes, I absolutely love spending time with my girls and seeing their personalities develop as they get older – except the attitude, they can keep the attitude 😉 I guess I’m still struggling with fitting in all the activities and finding a good routine, however we made a decision this year not to take on as much so hopefully that will settle things down as the year progresses.

  7. Hell yes it gets so much easier!!! I love my teenagers. They babysit their younger siblings (6 and 9) when hubby and I go out. They are there with them after school if for some reason I can’t be. I have them do jobs around the house. We go out to concerts, dinners, movies and have a great time! Plus they generally look after themselves…what’s not to love…except for the raging hormonal temper tantrums, the excessive phone bills, the argumentative attitude…. just as long as you now know that they are always right…it’s plain sailing!

  8. My 3 (aged 10, 7, and 4) are certainly a lot easier at the moment than they were when they were younger. We are in what I call “the golden era” – no toddlers, no teenagers. As a high school teacher, I know the teen years ahead of us are going to have their ups and downs. So far as balance goes, I work and my husband is half at home, half running the farm. But he is around out of school hours and the farm has the flexibility and lifestyle to give us time to focus on the kids as needed. We muddle along, and though I wouldn’t call it perfect, it seems to mostly work.

  9. Parenting is much harder as children get older, my oldest is 21 (youngest 1).
    Though I still remember those early years as some of the most physically and emotionally challenging. When you children are older it’s that and more, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually challenging. It’s just harder in a different way, or maybe for me because I have the age spread, so many hats to wear. And yet it is so rewarding too, a beautiful time with beautiful people

    • Yes I totally agree! It’s definitely the emotional side of things that are rapidly changing, not just the routine of running around getting to after school activities. In another month I’ll have Miss 9, Miss 5 and a newborn so I will also need to deal with varying ages and their individual needs. But you’re right, I wouldn’t have it any other way – love my girls!

  10. They always need you. I was fortunate enough to be a SAHM til my kids started school, then worked part time 5 mins from home until the youngest was in Year 10 – then I started working from home. And even though officially my kids are “grown” and “no longer need me” I’m really glad I’m always around 🙂

  11. It gets harder but easier if that makes sense. New things pop up to challenge you but you deal with it. The hardest part I have found is letting them go. They want privacy and space and freedom and man that is a tough thing for us who are so used to protecting them xx

  12. My kids are 9, 8 and 5 and it has certainly gotten easier physically! No prams, no cots, no lifting, no pushing. But the emotional pull is strong – the power struggles, eye rolling, pushing the boundaries and knowing what is going on at school are our biggest challenges now. But these are far outweighed by being able to have a conversation with my kids about different countries, cultures, lives, idea, watching their thirst for knowledge grow, seeing their personalities and sense of independence growing and being part of their growing lives makes this prime years of our lives. Right now, we are still rockstars in their eyes. Roll on 5 years when we have teenagers and watch this space! Every phase has a new challenge and reward… enjoy your new baby!

  13. Pingback: Digital Parents Blog Carnival Host of the Month - The Last Degree

Leave a reply