This morning, I farewelled Miss 10 off on Grade 5/6 camp. My eldest daughter really is growing up so fast, a little too fast.
It has really got me thinking how the larger age gaps between my children means I am almost living my day-to-day life as polar opposites.
One moment I’m waving my eldest daughter off on the school bus, when only a few hours earlier I was patting and cuddling my 11-month-old back to sleep in middle of the night.
Some would say it’s the best of both worlds, others actually question how I maintain my sanity as I try to fit school and extracurricular activities around my baby’s routine … although I use the word ‘routine’ extremely loosely because she really just has to fit into what is going on around her most of the time.
As I snuggled with Baby last night, I felt exhausted and somewhat frustrated that she continues to wake night after night after night. At the same time, I thought of Miss 10 asleep in her room down the hall most likely dreaming of the exciting week that lay ahead at camp and I realised that this whole ‘having a baby and raising a child’ thing really does all go by way too fast. I know that sounds totally corny and cliché but I feel like I’m experiencing both ends of the spectrum right now and having these thoughts so clearly.
Do I want a baby who sleeps from 7pm-7am? Of course. Do I feel like I’m in some way failing to meet my KPIs as a mother by not having this down pat by now? Sometimes. But then to put it into perspective …. do I realise that it all goes by far too quickly? Yes, for sure. Do I realise that I need to make the most of this time and that I’ll never get these moments back again? Most definitely.
Sometimes I think we all need to remind ourselves of those latter questions and answers as that’s what matters most.
Now is the time to enjoy and watch my three daughters grow, not only in age but in wisdom, and to make the most of these life stages and the opportunities they bring, both to me as mother and for my children.
I’m really going to miss my little girl while she’s on camp … the house will certainly be a lot quieter over the next five days. But I’m so looking forward to all the exciting stories she will tell me and the conversations we will have over afternoon tea when she returns on Friday afternoon.